The start of this year has been memorable for all the wrong reasons. Unless you have been back packing in the amazon or similar, you will be aware of all the celebrity deaths,, most of which were unexpected to the masses. Unfortunately in our house we are also dealing with the death of someone more close to home, but as it turns out even more private.
Now this may sound very morose and dark but after the last few weeks I have been through trying to pre empt problems and mediate opinions, if there is one thing I implore you to do, and that is write a plan of what you would prefer once you have left this mortal plane. Then give a copy to your next of kin or better still to a couple of people. It has been a nightmare trying to sort out not just the logistics of death but the planning of a service. Now I may be a little gothic in my belief that a funeral need to have some structure and dignity, but when you haven't got all the facts to plan a service, where else do you start.
I am not saying that you have to write out your entire service, but ideas for hymns readings even dress would be nice. To be truthful the only people who have benefited from the head in the sand attitude I am dealing with are nescafe and Benson and hedges. Grief, even more so over the festive season is painful enough, but added stress like this is even worse. Not because I want a grand affair, but because I am now suffering insomnia for fear of letting the person down. I have no bench mark or guidelines in which to plan. This already has caused disagreements within the planning party as to what is acceptable.
I would love to say this is a one off but 16 years ago I was in exactly the same position, to the point that our family split in half over opinions and only now have started to to talk to each other. Yet nothing seems to have been learnt from that experience. So come Friday, I am bracing myself for a repeat performance, wrecked with guilt, sorrow and now fear. But I know exactly what I am doing this week. Macabre as it may sound I am putting pen to paper and writing my requests down for others. So that no one else is left in the situation I am in again.
We have already lost too many people this year, and hopefully everyone can honour the losses in their own way, we don't ever expect or want to accept our time is limited. But me 2016 the year you at least accept that it helps the people left behind if you put it on paper what you want.
Sunday, 17 January 2016
Thursday, 7 January 2016
traffic wardens and other jerks
Most of us drivers have suffered the indignity of a penalty notice stuck to our windscreen. To be honest I would say I deserved 90% of them, and up to yesterday only one stuck in my mind as totally unjust..But yesterday's ticket took the absolute biscuit and if I ever get hold of the "person", note the quote marks, who wrote it, I am in serious danger of doing bodily harm.
I, you see, are like a many others out there registered disabled complete with a blue badge, due to the fact my back and attachments are not necessarily on speaking terms with my brain. Those of us out there with these badges do get access to more accessible parking, supposedly! That is if it isn't already full of taxis, motorbikes, school run mums in a hurry, delivery lorries and every other jersey who abuses these spaces. There is a reason why we have access to such spaces, we can't walk as far or carry as much as the rest of the world. So where as some people struggle carrying their weekly shop back to their car, in my case a bottle of milk, loaf of bread, the paper and a small box of vegetable burgers has me yelping in pain to get back to the car. But if I wanted a cup of coffee it was non optional. After wasting 20 minutes and god knows what in fuel trying to find an empty space in these bays in a local high street.
Now these bays are sign posted disabled only and if everyone parks in the same direction you can get 4 possibly 5 cars in this space. However yesterday 3 cars managed to occupy the space parked in such a fashion a micra took the space of a limousine. I was not happy especially as I have a small little 2 seater. There are no white lines round the bays on the bays on the pavement only ripples in the pavement, which I now no means don't cross unless you want £110 bill. Now this is where I get really cross, when i parked a, I was the only blue badge in the bays.b, the bays rippled markers are on diagonals so unless the reliant Robin is on the return no normal shaped car fits on the ends, with in these lines, and c, my local borough must have employed a discriminatory twin of an Olympic sprinter.
It's the later point that really got me. Mainly because the law I now find is so variable it's a wonder we all don't have a direct debit going straight to our local parking authority. Now I ain't stupid with parking laws, as my hubby was one of these marshals till he saw the light. I even know enough to have successfully appalled one of those clamping firm tickets he obtained in the summer. But this one got me. Now most tickets a traffic warden has to observe the legal breech for 3 Min's before getting pen to paper, so all those jerks parked in the blue bays have a chance to escape. But apparently if your wheel so much as touches the wrong side of a textured kerb, no observation time is required, that ticket is yours. So I found out yesterday after 30 minutes in a phone queue to query this. Sod the fact that in the 15 minutes I was parked 6 yes 6 other cars were parked illegally in those bays, it me the the blue badge holder, forced to apart on the end bay that got the £110 ticket, or in English I can kiss good bye to 5th of my monthly income this month.
So tell me how the hell this is fair. I who can't walk to the 30 minute free bays that the other cars can use, gets a ticket because of actions of others. Why , if this is the case are there no white lines round these disabled bays showing the point of legality, why do you have bays in shapes cars can fit unless they either risk a ticket or worse losing the boot to the buses driving behind who don't care if they hit your over hanging arse.
And how the hell can a traffic warden can witness, write up a ticket stick it on my car and disappeared from sight in 3 minutes.. If they can move that fast we should win the 100 metres at Rio this year with them on team UK. Seriously though how come you can abuse a disabled bay and get a 3 minute grace to move your car, and of course 90% of those cars leave the driver in for just this reason. But if you are disabled don't you dare escape your pen or you will pay immediately, no grace allowed.
All this tells me is the laws, even on the road are still as prejudice as they were in the 1970's and we have the prodigal offspring of Hitler employed to crackling the whip. Sure I pay the dam ticket, but seriously I am going to jam up the system with paper work to make sure it isn't cost effective for them to receive the money.
Traffic wardens stop looking for the easy tickets and start ticketing the real jerks.
I, you see, are like a many others out there registered disabled complete with a blue badge, due to the fact my back and attachments are not necessarily on speaking terms with my brain. Those of us out there with these badges do get access to more accessible parking, supposedly! That is if it isn't already full of taxis, motorbikes, school run mums in a hurry, delivery lorries and every other jersey who abuses these spaces. There is a reason why we have access to such spaces, we can't walk as far or carry as much as the rest of the world. So where as some people struggle carrying their weekly shop back to their car, in my case a bottle of milk, loaf of bread, the paper and a small box of vegetable burgers has me yelping in pain to get back to the car. But if I wanted a cup of coffee it was non optional. After wasting 20 minutes and god knows what in fuel trying to find an empty space in these bays in a local high street.
Now these bays are sign posted disabled only and if everyone parks in the same direction you can get 4 possibly 5 cars in this space. However yesterday 3 cars managed to occupy the space parked in such a fashion a micra took the space of a limousine. I was not happy especially as I have a small little 2 seater. There are no white lines round the bays on the bays on the pavement only ripples in the pavement, which I now no means don't cross unless you want £110 bill. Now this is where I get really cross, when i parked a, I was the only blue badge in the bays.b, the bays rippled markers are on diagonals so unless the reliant Robin is on the return no normal shaped car fits on the ends, with in these lines, and c, my local borough must have employed a discriminatory twin of an Olympic sprinter.
It's the later point that really got me. Mainly because the law I now find is so variable it's a wonder we all don't have a direct debit going straight to our local parking authority. Now I ain't stupid with parking laws, as my hubby was one of these marshals till he saw the light. I even know enough to have successfully appalled one of those clamping firm tickets he obtained in the summer. But this one got me. Now most tickets a traffic warden has to observe the legal breech for 3 Min's before getting pen to paper, so all those jerks parked in the blue bays have a chance to escape. But apparently if your wheel so much as touches the wrong side of a textured kerb, no observation time is required, that ticket is yours. So I found out yesterday after 30 minutes in a phone queue to query this. Sod the fact that in the 15 minutes I was parked 6 yes 6 other cars were parked illegally in those bays, it me the the blue badge holder, forced to apart on the end bay that got the £110 ticket, or in English I can kiss good bye to 5th of my monthly income this month.
So tell me how the hell this is fair. I who can't walk to the 30 minute free bays that the other cars can use, gets a ticket because of actions of others. Why , if this is the case are there no white lines round these disabled bays showing the point of legality, why do you have bays in shapes cars can fit unless they either risk a ticket or worse losing the boot to the buses driving behind who don't care if they hit your over hanging arse.
And how the hell can a traffic warden can witness, write up a ticket stick it on my car and disappeared from sight in 3 minutes.. If they can move that fast we should win the 100 metres at Rio this year with them on team UK. Seriously though how come you can abuse a disabled bay and get a 3 minute grace to move your car, and of course 90% of those cars leave the driver in for just this reason. But if you are disabled don't you dare escape your pen or you will pay immediately, no grace allowed.
All this tells me is the laws, even on the road are still as prejudice as they were in the 1970's and we have the prodigal offspring of Hitler employed to crackling the whip. Sure I pay the dam ticket, but seriously I am going to jam up the system with paper work to make sure it isn't cost effective for them to receive the money.
Traffic wardens stop looking for the easy tickets and start ticketing the real jerks.
Tuesday, 5 January 2016
300 not out
So my 300th post is here, having taken a year's sabbatical and come back with a bang in the last post, I finally have got some direction. 2016 is going to be the year I say it as it is, like it or not. I spent a long time reviewing from afar and internally ranting at what some one people think it's socially acceptable to do.
From body shaming to public witch hunting, my view on society at the present moment can be only described in the following words, despair, infuriating and complete anger. Harsh words I know, but my relief at the moment is I have no children to raise into this world we live! That said I no feel no less responsible for the example we set the future generations.
What's worse is it doesn't seem to stop there, we have people in power who seem to have studied Victoria society and decided that's a good template to run the country by. I am waiting to hear that work houses are making a come back. As for my thoughts for the poor people flooded over the Christmas season, I am surprised that you can't hear me yelling at the news from down here.
Seriously as an individual and a weakened one at that, I know there is little I can achieve, accept perhaps get my voice and opinions heard. What I can snow ball from that, I don't know, but let's give it a try.lets see if via blogging and social media,, I and hopefully others like me can get the reinstatement of common sense and social standards.
I am not looking to move mountains here, but let's flatten a few mole hills. Now I gave up on new years resolutions a few years back, but there is a time for change and I for one think and believe that time starts now. It can start with the little things for us all, from thinking before we speak to how we react in front of other people and on social media.
There is a reason why newspapers in our house are called kitty litter liners, and doubt I need to spell it out. But that's how much we rate a lot of tabloid journalism here. Don get me wrong, I am new junkie, but the key word is news, I have little respect for stories about sexual encounters of glamour models, shopping sprees of pop stars or what a celebrities teenage child is wearing. There are far more worthy matters to concern ourselves about.
For this reason I have found that I have resorted to having the news channels as background noise nowadays. My inclination towards fashion has dwindled to a back ground rumble, As my feelings towards social examples is stronger. How can I set any kind of standard if I spend every spare moment finding faults with my own image that I can do little about with out a complete body transplant and a bank balance of a small country. Sure I still like make up and clothes and my hair colour is as variable as the British weather, but sounding off about it is going be as constructive as a sand castle, looks pretty for a while till a wave washes it away and leaves a soggy mess.
Words are a tool by which we can carve better society, the right words to the right people can be inspirational, they can become the fuel to the growth of greater things. They can cut like a knife, create a lifetime wound, or become the light in a darkened tunnel. So this year I am using mine to speak up and hopefully inspire others. If little else I hope they can provide support to others, knowing I have invested the main gift I have , time to share.
From body shaming to public witch hunting, my view on society at the present moment can be only described in the following words, despair, infuriating and complete anger. Harsh words I know, but my relief at the moment is I have no children to raise into this world we live! That said I no feel no less responsible for the example we set the future generations.
What's worse is it doesn't seem to stop there, we have people in power who seem to have studied Victoria society and decided that's a good template to run the country by. I am waiting to hear that work houses are making a come back. As for my thoughts for the poor people flooded over the Christmas season, I am surprised that you can't hear me yelling at the news from down here.
Seriously as an individual and a weakened one at that, I know there is little I can achieve, accept perhaps get my voice and opinions heard. What I can snow ball from that, I don't know, but let's give it a try.lets see if via blogging and social media,, I and hopefully others like me can get the reinstatement of common sense and social standards.
I am not looking to move mountains here, but let's flatten a few mole hills. Now I gave up on new years resolutions a few years back, but there is a time for change and I for one think and believe that time starts now. It can start with the little things for us all, from thinking before we speak to how we react in front of other people and on social media.
There is a reason why newspapers in our house are called kitty litter liners, and doubt I need to spell it out. But that's how much we rate a lot of tabloid journalism here. Don get me wrong, I am new junkie, but the key word is news, I have little respect for stories about sexual encounters of glamour models, shopping sprees of pop stars or what a celebrities teenage child is wearing. There are far more worthy matters to concern ourselves about.
For this reason I have found that I have resorted to having the news channels as background noise nowadays. My inclination towards fashion has dwindled to a back ground rumble, As my feelings towards social examples is stronger. How can I set any kind of standard if I spend every spare moment finding faults with my own image that I can do little about with out a complete body transplant and a bank balance of a small country. Sure I still like make up and clothes and my hair colour is as variable as the British weather, but sounding off about it is going be as constructive as a sand castle, looks pretty for a while till a wave washes it away and leaves a soggy mess.
Words are a tool by which we can carve better society, the right words to the right people can be inspirational, they can become the fuel to the growth of greater things. They can cut like a knife, create a lifetime wound, or become the light in a darkened tunnel. So this year I am using mine to speak up and hopefully inspire others. If little else I hope they can provide support to others, knowing I have invested the main gift I have , time to share.
sod galaxies far far away this shit got real
I let my blog slide thinking the world didn't need just another shouting voice, however over this season of goodwill (cough) I have been appalled at the socially acceptable issue of body shaming and the such I have witnessed.
Now let's get this straight from the start, I have as many issues with my looks as the next woman, be she 18 or 80, unfortunately I think it is genetically programmed in woman in to always look to improve. However that's an internal battle we have, and also the same drive we have to achieve total social equality and what also got us the vote. That said what really made me snap was the seeming acceptability there is in the media to make personal comments on a woman's appearance in regard to ageing. You can probably see where I am going with this now, but who the hell thinks it's right to compare how a woman ages in relation to her Co stars on film. What's more what kind of social example does that send to the viewers of said film.
Just because oh thirty years ago the same said actress happened to wear a bikini in the same series of films, does not make it acceptable to make personal remarks now, all of which I personally think are totally incorrect anyway. All it really does is a, make the reporter involved look like a major graduate in sexism with a side of two dimensional thinking, b, send a bad message out there to any performer of the female sex saying your career is founded on your looks only, and c, raising the business profile of every plastic surgeon everywhere.
In an ideal world everyone would have perfect teeth, be a perfect clothes size etc, and then have nothing to achieve and get bored. But that's not even the worst thing about this, it's the fact that women STILL seemed to be valued by appearance only, not by their intellect or what they achieve. Why is this so, that clothes size is more important than IQ? Have we totally forgotten the likes of Marie Curie, Mother Theresa or and it pains me to so this Margaret Thatcher, women who proved themselves equal if not better to men.
Let's get a few prior straight, a lot of women I know me included refer to make up as war paint for reason, in my house so much so I have a tool box not a vanity case. We use it to deceive people into believing in our camouflage (THINK SAS HERE). While we are on that matter also bearing mind high heels where historically created for men to tower over women, talk about role reversal. In my house if my heels come out for anything other than a ball, they know to run because it means I'm asserting my authority. By the same law of logic the idiot who wrote the article that caused me to go back to blogging ought to be very afraid, as his target is also an accomplished author and script doctor and her words are far sharper that a kitchen knife.
All that's become apparent to me is yes words are sharper than the sword, but be careful where you aim them. Sure they hurt their initial celebrity target, but it's the ripples of self loathing that's created into the masses that's more destructive. Celebrities young or old (and their offspring/partners) are becoming role models for many, whether we like it or not. So ripping into them because of their appearance has a dangerous social affect. By this reasoning reporters who promote body shaming, should be held into account for promotion in eating disorders and worse.
To all the people who have suffered being made a victim of such body shaming, raise your heads up above it, the day of reckoning is soon. Body's are only nature's tool to carry your brain and soul in, they are far more valuable than skin and bone shells. If you are need of proof, I suggest you watch the 1st half of return of the Jedi and see what a women in a bikini did to a space slug ...... Now judge a woman by her cover.
Now let's get this straight from the start, I have as many issues with my looks as the next woman, be she 18 or 80, unfortunately I think it is genetically programmed in woman in to always look to improve. However that's an internal battle we have, and also the same drive we have to achieve total social equality and what also got us the vote. That said what really made me snap was the seeming acceptability there is in the media to make personal comments on a woman's appearance in regard to ageing. You can probably see where I am going with this now, but who the hell thinks it's right to compare how a woman ages in relation to her Co stars on film. What's more what kind of social example does that send to the viewers of said film.
Just because oh thirty years ago the same said actress happened to wear a bikini in the same series of films, does not make it acceptable to make personal remarks now, all of which I personally think are totally incorrect anyway. All it really does is a, make the reporter involved look like a major graduate in sexism with a side of two dimensional thinking, b, send a bad message out there to any performer of the female sex saying your career is founded on your looks only, and c, raising the business profile of every plastic surgeon everywhere.
In an ideal world everyone would have perfect teeth, be a perfect clothes size etc, and then have nothing to achieve and get bored. But that's not even the worst thing about this, it's the fact that women STILL seemed to be valued by appearance only, not by their intellect or what they achieve. Why is this so, that clothes size is more important than IQ? Have we totally forgotten the likes of Marie Curie, Mother Theresa or and it pains me to so this Margaret Thatcher, women who proved themselves equal if not better to men.
Let's get a few prior straight, a lot of women I know me included refer to make up as war paint for reason, in my house so much so I have a tool box not a vanity case. We use it to deceive people into believing in our camouflage (THINK SAS HERE). While we are on that matter also bearing mind high heels where historically created for men to tower over women, talk about role reversal. In my house if my heels come out for anything other than a ball, they know to run because it means I'm asserting my authority. By the same law of logic the idiot who wrote the article that caused me to go back to blogging ought to be very afraid, as his target is also an accomplished author and script doctor and her words are far sharper that a kitchen knife.
All that's become apparent to me is yes words are sharper than the sword, but be careful where you aim them. Sure they hurt their initial celebrity target, but it's the ripples of self loathing that's created into the masses that's more destructive. Celebrities young or old (and their offspring/partners) are becoming role models for many, whether we like it or not. So ripping into them because of their appearance has a dangerous social affect. By this reasoning reporters who promote body shaming, should be held into account for promotion in eating disorders and worse.
To all the people who have suffered being made a victim of such body shaming, raise your heads up above it, the day of reckoning is soon. Body's are only nature's tool to carry your brain and soul in, they are far more valuable than skin and bone shells. If you are need of proof, I suggest you watch the 1st half of return of the Jedi and see what a women in a bikini did to a space slug ...... Now judge a woman by her cover.
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