Oscar hangover

So stupidity reigned and I did stay up to watch the Oscar's, and actually it was refreshing viewing. For once it wasn't a pat on the back for the white film makers, but a truely honest reflection of winners from all demographics. But boy when they cock it up they really do make an art of it. But that's not my post, it's more about the opulance wasted on one night.

I don't begrudge the awards, and the glamour and glitz as it brings so much to so many. What gets me is the run up, and after events. Even the goodie bags seem to be a way to demos rate excess for what? Sure if you want to give a thank you gift one necklace or cuff links etc would be sufficient but bags in the region of the value of $16000 is just offensive. Before you say anything I think the same of the BAFTA'S and any other awards ceremony. Surely the nomination and possible win are reward enough. It's not just the value it's the gifts themselves, holidays, personal trainers vouchers, plastic surgery vouchers are all the norm. Now let's get some things clear, most actors or any person in the industry works on the bread line, living job to job and taking on other jobs to pay the rent. It's only 5% max who make the glossy heights of these awards. So basically the already highly paid are having money thrown at them. Occasionally you get a few underdogs win, but it rare, and a win alone can increase your financial worth, as you are seen as a good bet for film returns. So why are we giving these people even more?

I have to be honest, if I was in their position I would be embarrassed to accept these items, and apart from maybe a trinket to remind me of the event most of it would be given to charity or something, bar certain things like plastic surgery vouchers. These I have a real, issue with, they shouldn't be handed out like bottles of fragrance, but something a person carefully thinks about, after all it is surgery. It's not a case of taking your body for a service like you would a car and having it resprayed and reshaped. That is just crazy.

Then we get to the pre show parties and then the after show parties. These are just over the top. A few and I mean few are used for charity fundraisers, fair enough, but the rest are just ways of promotion in wealth in the most grotesque fashion with food and drink. In current light it is the wrong way to unite the people. One agency did kick the fashion this year and organised a rally of unity, for public and media alike, rather than hold their annual gala. Good for them, they got their hands dirty and jeans on rather than waste days sourcing the perfect dress to wear whilst holding a glass of champagne worth more than some people's hourly rate.

I have been to so many galas and ball over the years and to be honest I don't why they even bother with food. It often comes out looking more like a piece of art rather than a meal. Often it's cold and rarely lives up to its expectation. Nine times out of ten I end up at a burger joint afterwards. Hence when Ellen ordered pizza in at the Oscars a few years back I really laughed. Especially considering most of the artists have been on such stupid diets since Christmas to prepare to wear gowns probably a size smaller than they usually wear.

The whole concept is so fake and detracts from the real event, awarding people who have excelled in their craft. Sure put a fancy dress on and have a good night, but don't create barriers of wealth, especially in current times, when it is these same people speaking out against prejudice. It doesn't work and in one week can destroy a years worth of rallying.

Give your audience a Cinderella of an event to watch, by all means, but let's not become drowned into a event that makes the french court of Louis the XIV look tame.  So whilst they are nursing champagne hangovers, maybe it's time to think, this is the time to change the habits of greed and take it down to a more realistic level minus the material gain.

Opinion or trolling

I have recently been made aware of the arts of social media lack the subtlety of face to face communication. Not from any thing I have or done, but the effects it has had on others. It's made me stop and think a little not just about what I post, but by what is posted to me.

I tend to keep my opinions, or rather detailed opinions to here where people choose to read it. But I do tend to rant a bit on various social media sites. However I never deliberately aim it at one specific person, unless they start on me. More often than not I tend to give them a chance to give an adult point of view and if they get mean I get friendly with the block button. I also have a decent real life support group who also have social media accounts so I have online and real life grounding. But it has left me thinking when is the line actually crossed, when does a debate become trolling? And what is there really there to support people who feel victimised?

Sure we all can use the block button, and the report button, but to the more emotionally engaged of us is that enough. There is no real forum or support group for victims of online trolling, to teach people the skills to detach from the emotional trauma of it all. Because given its true name trolling is just invisible bullying whether it's at a Hollywood star or a 14 year old girl in her bedroom. In the last few weeks I've seen it happen to both, and in both cases I have tried to reach out with support, one took it the other didn't, as it has happened I also noticed another person I follow has just deleted all social media and I am hardly surprised having seen their time line recently it was filled with hateful messages from people who have no real life knowledge of the person, but still chose to ridicule without full facts. It's this mentality that frightens me, that people judge based on 140 character remarks.

In no circumstances is it right to joke about mental health, depression or worse, yet people on mass made it the fuel to insult every aspect of the persons life be it public or personal. Hang on a moment, isn't there a big awareness drive to promote mental well being and encourage people to open up about depression? Yet if some one with public status admits to it, whatever the cause it become an annual duck shoot, no that just not right. The line between reality and social media is not that hazy. If it is wrong to say it a face to face then it must be wrong to do it on social media. Hence I hate the word trolling , it makes it sound more soft, less offensively. It is what it is bullying, no better or worse than picking on smallest child in the playground, or the quietest administration in the office. If you type words full of hate and venom then it should be treated the same way as a basic bully.

I actually get scared to think how far this can go online, we have all read about the poor teens who are driven to suicide over this. But it's not just teens who are vulnerable, in reality we all are on a bad day, doesn't matter if your face is on vogue, or you serve burgers, we all have feelings, emotions and vulnerability. I'm no expert, but I have to admit I pick my days to rant, when I know something I type will cause mix reactions, so I am braced for the onslaught of abuse and support. It sounds calculated, but it's my self preservation routine. I don't dislike adult debate in fact I quite relish the idea of a sensible debate, but for the one person I get onine who will debate and reason, I have to block upwards of 10 people who want to batter me to the kerb just to justify their own existence.

So much as social media can be a cure for loneliness at times, and a source of information and comfort, it comes with teeth.  Like an unknown sea it's worth stepping in cautiously and not diving head first in.  I dread to think what the cost is going to be before the moderators really look at modifying it to become safer. And the next time you moan because your favourite pop  star has deleted their snap chat or some thing, ask yourself what they may be feeling, have they just been bombarded with hateful comments? And more importantly make sure you are supporting your friends online, a throw away joke can easily be misinterpreted online, chose your words wisely. I leave with a famous quote that is so relevant to this.

The pen is mightier than the sword.

Well that's what a weather bomb is?

Is it me or have we taken to adding extreme labels to what used to be defined in more simple terms? I grew up in the 70's and 80's, when we experienced snow and hurricanes during my education. It those days they were called either snow days or like in 1987 we got storm days, when the weather brought down one in every three trees where I live. But if we could we got up, brushed ourselves down and if we could went to school or work. Sure it could get a little scary like trying to get home during the storm 1989, but we managed and I am sure it toughened us up a bit. But I never heard a weather incident being called a bomb, what's with that?

Have we become so over zealous with health and safety that things have to be labelled with such dramatic sub fixes that the fear of all that is holy is enforced on us. I mean, sure weather can be dangerous and unpredictable, fatal even, but nothing common sense shouldn't be able to guide us through. I do believe since the dawn of man we have had weather, extreme weather even, so why have we suddenly become so sceptical about it? Why do we all go into mass hysteria at the mention of snow? It is either going to fall or not , so why the crazed rush to the nearest store to by all the milk and bread you might need for an army for the next week? Chances are it will be a light dusting gone by the next morning and if it is worse, you do have legs, walking is an option. Its not like the majority of us don't live 15 minutes away from some shop!

The whole situation makes me alternate between laughing at the stupidity and crying with despair. Are we really so soft now no one can make a loaf of bread at home ? Or do you not know you can buy powdered milk? I know come October after making all the jams, chutneys etc from our home grown stuff I do a full cupboard check, stocking up on basics like flour, yeast, canned lentils and other dried goods. Yes it's a little old fashioned, but it means we never have these panics, nor do we ever run out over the Christmas season if friends drop in. Then about March or April we consciously start running down the stock and not replacing in the shop. Yes we also have candles and batteries in stock. Even the odd sleeping bag and duvet. But it just takes the stress out of life.

Maybe being disabled for the five years means I am overly aware of my limitations, and snow days are a thing of my past, but we make it a family activity and part of our families harvest for want of a better way of putting it. It could also stem from the fact I spent half my youth living with family on the edges of Dartmouth where weather could physically cut you off and the power could just go out. I don't know, but I do know that now living in the suburbs it's hard to understand this panic mentality and over dramatics of a fierce wind. If you lived in the Highlands of Scotland or even on the coast of the north Sea I would understand, but not in greater London. We are too populated to end up in that kind of chaos.


I'm not belittling the property damage or danger there can be, but that's always going to happen and there is little we can do but avoid unnecessary risk. Just make sure the elderly and more vulnerable don't have to put themselves at risk. I stuck my nose out this morning to see my wheelie bin looking more like a weeble that a static object, that was enough for me to know the garden centre can wait till tomorrow or the weekend rather than me adding myself to the statistics of my local hospital. For those who work etc, it's not so easy, but doable, you just have to slow up and accept time is  not your friend today and everything will take longer. Travel will be upset, but better late than dead in my book and sure you may be late home and frustrated at that, but it's nothing personal and next week will be forgotten.

These are normal occurrences in life, the weather is something we just have to live with, along with other people and taxes, they are a fact of life. There is no point in panicking and absolutely nothing is achieved by giving them dramatic labels. Instead we have renamed it stew and dumpling day, and if I am very lucky it may also be mulled cider day. But it certainly doesn't need to be a weather bomb day, just a little hiccup, that equals tomorrow will be find your bin day.

And now the crash to earth

So after much delay and multiple tantrums I finally got the answer about my leg. It's not exactly what I wanted to hear, but I have the worse and best case scenario facts. That said it was a struggle to get the whole story and I really don't like having to stamp my feet and yell before these are offered on an intellectual equal basis. But that's a row for another day.

For none of this gives me the not so quick fix it want and needed. After 4 months of being limited by fiberglass and pain, I've had it spelt out to me that it's going to be a long slow battle and I maybe only a third of the way through it. In reality I may still be in plaster till June and almost certainly in an airboot till the full 12 months are up. The only consolation I have from all this is the fact that even if I had agreed to the operation everyone was so keen on the length of healing time would be no shorter and quite possibly longer. That's not even taking any possible complications I may have had into consideration.

So the reality of this is if you break 3 bones in your leg in a complicated fashion like I did nothing is going to speed up the healing not even surgery. Personally I am little depressed by this fact as I have already been knocked back years with my back recovery and every week this goes on for drags me down further.

But what can I do? It is clinical fact and only nature can take its chosen course.  I'm just along for the ride.

Just a little nervous

I may have mentioned I'm am currently knee high in plaster. Thanks to myself and an unlit ramp having a disagreement in October I've been hopping through life with at least three broken bones and a fibreglass cast. Well for me tomorrow is decision day, whether it finally healing properly on its own or whether my consultant demands it does need surgery.

Personally I've been dodging the surgery route for many reasons. One of the main ones is the NHS seems to be so overstretched that my consultant had not and probably still hasn't fully read my notes. For if he had he would have known I have spent the last five years on crutches because of my back and haven't been fully mobile since 2011. But that was news to him when he threatened I wouldn't walk properly and I said well I hadn't in 5 years anyway.  There were several other red flags during my 18 hours emergency admission, like taking no notice I was in shock and borderline hypothermic, that I was in so much pain I was burning through morphine in 20 minutes, no one told me what I had broken and how bad it was and so on. But the main reason for all my issues was the NHS was so overwhelmed it couldn't take 5 minutes out to actually talk me through everything and instead tried to enforce some form of institutional regime on me.

The whole course of my treatment has been a bit of a conflict, to the point they have me on a medicine I researched only to find out it is meat based, and I have been a strict vegetarian since 1981 due to allergy. When I tackled them on it, my concern was disregarded and told I had to take it or die. Which even I know is bull, as there are 3 options medically I know of. It raised more and more questions in my head, would they force and Jew to take this pork based medicine, or would they just not tell them like me? Would they force a Hindi to take a beef based medicine?  Has our medical service got to such a level that any personal information or choice is secondary to their demands?

In reality part if this has been brought upon ourselves, by agreeing to do certain cosmetic surgeries because someone doesn't like their nose/chest/etc. Sure there are cases where a person is injured or disfigured through no fault of their own, where that is a necessary, but I have heard of so many people having unnecessary operations on the NHS it makes me scream. I can honestly say every time I have been in surgery my life and health depended on it.

But it's not just us individuals who are to blame. The management in the NHS is shocking. I know this because I grew up in the eviroment, I was there when the pattern of behaviour changed for the worse. Gone was the input from the people hands on in the hospital and in came advisors and management from the private sector, when that happened commonsense left the building. I have been witness to one in three light bulbs being removed, and people sitting in their chair with a dead person in the bed beside them because some one was on strike.

Since all this happened the accident and emergency room has become a pit stop for drunken idiots who think it's the norm to be the and get sewn back together at our expense. There seems no move to stop this either. By ridding the hospital of the power of the matron, it has removed it from the concept of moral common sense. In its past a matron would have the power and respect to sort the wheat from the chaff, thus saving unnecessary expense. Now it's all middle management and fear of the suing culture that has developed.

I have been told several times over I could sue for thousands, but that's not in my nature. The NHS is there to provide for us all when we most need it. But it's very existence relies on our ability to self evaluate, if you are drunk no amount of medical care is going improve you till you are sober in fact you are just hogging a bed from someone desperate for it . instead deal with your drunken state then if you are really in pain see your gp. Likewise if you wake up feeling like hell on earth see if over the counter stuff works first, a horrid cold just needs time and fluids. Use the phone service if necessary, I did for swine flu and was immediately treated medicine shipped to me and put on house arrest till my gp could deal. Sounds bad, well at least I didn't share it with all my friends. And yes I really did have it i was ill for 8 weeks, nearly hospilised twice. I dropped 3 dress sizes and it has left me permanently weakened with lasting effects.

The whole point is if used correctly the NHS should work for all, but because a few are majorly abusing it its working for none. To the point I am scared to put my life and health in their hands as they are so over stretched. I've spent 4 months so far in plaster and not once has a doctor made me feel safe or reassured by their understanding of my full condition. Ten minutes of conversation and discussion of options could have saved this but it's ten minutes that they have to spend on the abusers and health tourists.

Little fish

Grrrr I am so mad with the news channels today and it's not over politics for a change. It's over sport reporting, which if you know me, will know this is unusual. I am not the world's greatest sports fan. Sure I have been to see Crystal palace play, and like horse sports and motor sports, but that's as far as I go. I will cheer on my local team and obviously nationally when  they deserve it.

However this year's FA Cup has got interesting as my local football team, that are really low on all the leagues have made it through to play on of the highest teams in the country, tonight. Good for Sutton United, the players deserve the credit as most players a day jobs and practise on top of that. They have no high transfer fees, a tiny pitch, and only enough seats for local style matches. I know this because for two years I worked opposite their home ground. Match days were always fun as parking was limited, and I ran the off license opposite  so if they won we got very busy very quickly.

Anyway that said, tonight they are playing out of the league and all the press and media have taken to reporting the fact. But it's the language they refer to the team I find insulting. Just because they don't have a high bank roll or grounds that include enough space to hold every few at food known to man, doesn't mean they are any less skilled or supported. In fact I believe they work harder to get to this position as they have less time to train having to work normal day jobs. But the media love to prefix their name with words like "little" or "underdog", it's just insulting. They maybe a non professional team with a changing room the size of my bed room but on the pitch they play just as hard with less monetary reward, but local praise overflowing.

It won't have been so noticeable to me, but for the fact this household saw it all before last year when Kansas City me the playoffs in the United States. My husband being a Kansas State boy, was over joyed, especially  as he had dragged me to Wembley which turned out to be their first win of a long run of wins. Don't ask me to explain more about that game I still have no idea, except their game is played in quarter which means more beer and hot dog time, whilst a band plays and girls in barely there outfits jump around to keep warm. But like Sutton United the media used the same derogatory language to Kansas City.

It seems to be in modern sporty out only carry any weight or credentials if you have a bottomless pit of money, most of your players are bought in rather than  local players, and you turn match into a bank breaking event for the family. This is why I don't follow sport much, it's too much business too little natural local talent. People forget the football team of 1966 that won the cup against Germany  all had proper jobs and not six figure salaries. They didn't have sponsorship deals to boost their already overflowing bank accounts. They had to win to get bonuses. May be that's how it should be. None of this pick and number and add six noughts to it transfer deals. You train with your local team, you have a proper day job to pay the bills, and only get rewarded when you actually win something . We would then have the chance to watch skilled talented players. Instead of spoilt brats who take a dive rather that get a bruise.

Sorry but that's how I feel and why tonight I'm cheering on Sutton United, knowing their fans watching live are long term season  ticket holders who watch rain or shine win or lose. They are the team that deserve to win even if they are little fish in a shark pond.

Duck! toys have started to fly

Well it was only a matter of time before the sins of  governments catches up with them. And hasn't the last 24 hours been full of it. Both sides of the Atlantic have seen people exposed for lying. In Britain it wasn't too bad but in the USA it's paving the way to impeachment I think.

The thing is no matter how sneaky or devious these people are, we are in a new world filled with technology. Nothing is truly private and everything is recorded some where. Whether it be what you bought 3 weeks ago in the supermarket, or who you sat with at gala dinner, some one some where will have the filmed and digital evidence. So the days of old school sneaky are long gone. You have to be a techno wizard to delete all the photo evidence of just going to shops nowadays. Whilst I am not entirely comfortable with this living version of or wells 1984, it has sure got rid of the biggest threat to American security since water gate.

What I didn't see coming was the pathetic whine from the supposed great leader, saying he was exposed by false news using illegally obtained documents. Er, OK if it is supposedly false news, surely there wouldn't be any documentation to obtain legally or illegally? And as for the legality of it all, maybe oh wonderful leader should worry less about what the press are doing and more about the fact he has broken the Constitution by discussing treaties with other not so friendly countries, before being sworn into power.

If all that wasn't bad enough there is small matter of only allowing 1 press organisation to cover any white house business, including allowing the owner sit through meetings with other countries Representatives. Mmm, that's not allowing the press the freedom they are legally entitled to, actually that sounds more like state run media only. And England is no better they are also allowing the same media house to do the same here. Which begs the question who is dictating to whom. Because I am now asking the question how much of this media control is being fed back to our lesser friends. It all stinks of a bigger corruption than we originally thought possible.

I am just watching for the moment, but if certain people keep stomping their feet saying it's false news etc, it will become a case of thousands protest too much. I actually fell about laughing at that little rant. I know I shouldn't as the whole thing is potentially very dangerous, but how can I take these people seriously when they can't get their own way they sulk.

By comparison we Brits are fighting the fact the government has completely disregarded us the voting public, the right to stop a certain state visit. Which is actually one of our civil rights. I notice there have been no tantrums though, or claiming falsehood. Nope we have dug our heels in and are going to a higher power,our monarch. Basically we are going to make it as difficult as possible for our government to carry on down this path. This really shows the difference in mentality between people who belief in true democracy and people who think their country is too stupid to make a decision. Both sides of the ocean the people's pester power is beginning to eat into the normal reserves of those in power, and make them throw all their toys out the pram. Guess we better keep ducking and diving because it is obvious they aren't going to stop their tantrum quietly. But they better to remember when they run out of toys we won't be giving them back, they will be on a permanent time out once they have done. Democracy will prevail but for now we have to ride this little hiccup and learn to laugh at the tantrums.

Inner wealth

Oh it seemed forever stopped today
All the lonely hearts in London
Caught a plane and flew away
And all the best women are married
All the handsome men are gay
You feel deprived

Yeah are you questioning your size?
Is there a tumour in your humour,
Are there bags under your eyes?
Do you leave dents where you sit,
Are you getting on a bit?
Will you survive
You must survive

When there's no love in town
This new century keeps bringing you down
All the places you have been
Trying to find a love supreme
A love supreme

(Robbie Williams Supreme)

Anyone who knows me knows I have a very elective taste in music, well in most things really. You are just as likely to hear me listening to Mozart as I am to be the latest dance track. I like what I like and nothing can alter my taste. In the same breathe I don't avidly follow one or two musicians buying every album regardless. Hence my CD collection is as chaotic as my DVD one. It's not I'm not loyalty, it's a case of each film, disc book etc is judged on its individual merit.

Actually a lot of my life is ruled by that, I don't like to get stuck in a repetitive rut. I won't stick with just one take away, mainly because I find they get lazy with my order if I use them to often. i get dissatisfied very easily. It's that point that lead me to the song I quoted above. I don't think I am alone in having the patience of a gnat as my family so kindly put it. I have always been demanding, not on a spoilt fashion, but in seeking better. I always put it down to the performer in me, I was never just satisfied, any performance I was in I could only see the faults I had made. This was the same when I started writing and directing youth arts. The drive I had to do better was strong enough to carry not only myself but the entire cast and crew. My poor flat mate at the time will tell you that we were setting up till gone midnight the night before because I wasn't happy with the lighting and music links. Stuff the fact it was my birthday or we had rehearsals 8 hours later I needed it sorted there and then.  The same when I competed musically, by my mid teens my family used to hire the services of my oldest friend to deal with me before I went on stage as it was like dealing 8an explosive.

It wasn't and isn't because I wanted more or to even win. It's this drive to better the moment, and where necessary implement equality and fairness. If a competitor was unfairly marked or judged, or rules broken I would the first to shout literally. By the same rules if I wasn't up to fair competition I would withdraw rather than half arse it. 

Only once can I remember competing unwillingly, I was 26 post ear surgery so I had lost 40% of my hearing and withdrawing because of that.  To top of that I had the cold from hell and that screwed hearing anything worth while. It was the week of my mentor, my grandads birthday, who was on the downward spiral of dementia at the time. Anyway we took him to the competition to hear the others and return my trophy from the previous years win. Totally disregarding my own views I find I have been entered and they won't let me back out. So I spent the next half hour doing nothing but scales etc to see if I could even hear in tune. The answer was no but it gave the instrument and I one hell of a warm up, then I glanced over a piece of music I was studying on the violin, not the banjolin I was competing on. Basically  they are tuned the same but played differently. Then before I knew it i was on the stage competing. I never heard the previous entrees  as I could not have heard them anyway I was literally winging it my hearing was so bad. Anyway I am playing this piece to Schubert praying to God I wasn't embarrassing my grandad coz I have no idea how it sounds just it feels OK. It's when I finish I am hyper aware of the silence. Even being practically deaf you can feel the stillness I remember glancing over at my grandad who for the first time I can remember has tears in his eyes. It feels an age but the reality is its seconds and I'm receiving a standing ovation.  But all that matters was the smile of my grandad. Somehow I had blown the completion out the water and won outright with the highest score to date. My grandad was dead within 8 weeks but for those 8 weeks and especially that day, he had seen the fulfilment of all the years of his and my work.

The point of that painful story is it was, as everyone has told me ever since, that the drive in me to always bring even better to the table meant I was more than ready to do the job when knocked back. By never being just happy with, means it's so ingrained in me I could perform in my sleep. I refuse to just settle and that's why I refer to the above song. The drive for a love supreme means to look for that thing called Utopia or Nirvana. The ultimate moment of perfection. Because by consistently seeking it, we can give others it on our journey. I never knew that the competition would be the last time my grandad would hear me perform, at that time he was walking etc. But in that performance it gave him so much joy, yet I never heard a note I played, and you know what it doesn't matter, the fact it brought him happiness was reward enough for me. That's when you realise your own inner wealth when you see the happiness in others.

Why the world needs superheroes

I've been trying for a long time to avoid the DC comics vs Marvel Cinematic Universe clash of films. Partly because my heart lies in the Star Wars direction of escapism and partly because I was never a comic geek.

Sure I have enjoyed the Rami directed spiderman and the 4 80's& 90's Batman series. But that's as far as my knowledge went, well till last year. I knew my green goblin from my joker, but no interest in superman of any era and as for the fact the Avengers and X men were in the same world and never heard of Guardians of the Galaxy. But now it's drowning the cinema and partly due to boredom and partly due to curiosity I began to read a bit of the links between characters etc.

Now despite my fondness of Tim Burton's Batman, I will call it now I'm team Marvel. This is no disrespect to DC and the characters as big as Harvey Quinn, the Joker and so on. For me it's just I find Marvel more complicated and thus more comfortable for my brain. I like complicated and messy it's like life itself and sorry DC but Superman is just too good to be valid.

Now that's out the way I will get to the point. The sudden surge of these world's into our lives. Why now? Well there's an answer I can come up with and ask the great Stan Lee if I'm right, and that is we need them. We, the world's society need the hope they offer and to believe in the power of good and bad, in the same way we needed them in comic books during their original outings. For our American readership what is more patriotic than Captain America, the perfect citizen even before the serum he wanted to serve his country for the greater good. For us British there is actually  a Captain Britain and his sister Psylocke. For European audiences there are Thor and the Black Widow and so on. There is multiracial characters sexuality ambitious characters and just plain fantastical characters, silver surfer anyone? What I am saying is there is a hero and or anti hero and quite possibly a villain for everyone. It's a complex cultural study. To be honest I can see many a creditable thesis of cultural reference being able to be written on what is basically and originally childish entertainment and moral propaganda.

Before you think I am being dismissive of this I am not . I am the person who wrote an a level paper of the religious undercurrent of ET in relation to the crucifixion and got a decent grade for it, even if I can never watch the film ever again. I also believe in years to come Star Wars is in the future going to be viewed in the same way we now see the brother Grimm and Hans Christian Anderson moral fairy tales. So I went into these films open minded. But I knew very little and have to play a lot of catch up. Even now I would say my knowledge is a Grade 3 on a 10 point scale but there is a limit to how much will go in, especially when I keep cheering for Harry Osborn over Spiderman, I know I'm warped. I also hold a little reserve when like my beloved Star Wars of see the dam stamp of a mouse over it now. So I do refer to ink rather than film at times. No offence Disney, but it's going to take me years for you to be forgiven for Frozen and that reached song.

Anyway the MCU and comics do hold true to the basic good versus evil story and morals but with one healthy dose of realism, some of the characters if not all of them are flawed beings. The first person who tries to tell me Tony Starke is a good role model will see my flaws. I may be a bit mean picking on him, but he is the most clearly flawed character. However each and everyone one has a touch of humanity in them. Be it wisecracking Deadpool, emotional detachment issues  in Rogue, arrogance of Thor and Loki or just plain anger issues in Hulk. Sure some are hammer up for entertainment purposes as are the construction of the abilities. I mean if there was really a way to turn yourself into a green testosterone wrecking ball via gamma radiation or a gymnast capable of shooting website from a spiders bite then there really would idiots in this world doing so. So the characters are always just that fraction exaggerated to become fiction. However in certain  characters like Iron Man, Falcon, Black Widow and even Professor  X there is that what if factor. Keeping it just on the realms of plausibility in the future evolution. And it is that reason that keeps grown adults hooked as much as children.

By capturing this element the purpose is complete. To give hope and positive propaganda in the source of entertainment without getting completely political with the message. Although anyone who can't see what hydra starting out representing needs a history 101 refresh. DC did get blatantly political with  The Watchmen and I'm sure if I dig deeper into will find the same with Marvel, but hopefully the mouse in their house will limit that on screen. But I digress, they are both a tidy little bundle of hope and inspiration wrapped up in often Lycra and garish colour taste. Although even the colour palette is very carefully constructed of primary colours mixed with metallic and black and white leaving the viewer under little doubt whose is what. With the exception of green, if a character is green or wearing green all bets are off as they can go either way. Green Goblin and Hulk for Marvel and the Riddler or poison Ivy. Black isn't the colour of bad or white the colour of good, but more a definition of a characters inner demons and driving force. It's all very political correct with making viewer aware of just how perfectly they are constructed. It's a way of working via the subconscious.

And that is the reason we need these films more than ever. We need these pedals tool idols to not so much believe in but to reassure us there is a way forward. By not realising just how much they can relate to our real world problems strengthens our addiction to them and by adding that touch of cute and ahh factors with the introduction of characters like baby groot, it is sure to capture even the more resistant of us all. So the reason we need superheroes in our lives is quite simple, for as long as we are struggling in times of darkest desperation we need hope and for some reason hope looks good in Lycra and or armour plating . So matter how old you are or who is your favourite it's ok to love a superhero(s) or in my case anti heros because anything that can offer entertainment and moral compass yet still looks good in tights and makes you laugh, well there is always a need for that.

For those in the UK against the state visit email update

	You’re receiving this email because you signed this petition: “Prevent Donald Trump from making a State Visit to the United Kingdom. The Government has responded to the petition you signed – “Prevent Donald Trump from making a State Visit to the United Kingdom.”. Government responded: HM Government believes the President of the United States should be extended the full courtesy of a State Visit. We look forward to welcoming President Trump once dates and arrangements are finalised. HM Government recognises the strong views expressed by the many signatories of this petition, but does not support this petition. During her visit to the United States on 27 January 2017, the Prime Minister, on behalf of Her Majesty the Queen, invited President Trump for a State Visit to the UK later this year. The invitation was accepted. This invitation reflects the importance of the relationship between the United States of America and the United Kingdom. At this stage, final dates have not yet been agreed for the State Visit. Foreign and Commonwealth Office Click this link to view the response online: https://petition.parliament.uk/petitions/171928?reveal_response=yes This petition has over 100,000 signatures. The Petitions Committee will consider it for a debate. They can also gather further evidence and press the government for action. The Committee is made up of 11 MPs, from political parties in government and in opposition. It is entirely independent of the Government. Find out more about the Committee: https://petition.parliament.uk/help#petitions-committee Thanks, The Petitions team UK Government and Parliament

Different dance

Kind of a different post tonight, only because I fancied a change. Tomorrow is valentine's day, or as I renamed it hallmark holiday no1. Despite being married and having had boyfriends I detest the day. The reason for this is so very complex, but I know I'm not the only one.

Apart from Christmas it is notorious for making the most number of people feel lonely, isolated and unloved. If that isn't a bad enough reason, then it should be. The other is it a completely warped history of the saint, for commercial gain. Second only to Christmas is religion manipulated to commercialism. Here is a quick history of the saint.

Valentine was eventually caught, imprisoned and tortured for performing marriage ceremonies against command of Emperor Claudius the second. There are legends surrounding Valentine's actions while in prison.

"One of the men who was to judge him in line with the Roman law at the time was a man called Asterius, whose daughter was blind. He was supposed to have prayed with and healed the young girl with such astonishing effect that Asterius himself became Christian as a result."

In the year 269 AD, Valentine was sentenced to a three part execution of a beating, stoning, and finally decapitation all because of his stand for Christian marriage. The story goes that the last words he wrote were in a note to Asterius' daughter. He inspired today's romantic missives by signing it, "from your Valentine."

Really cheerful isn't it. Hardly the stuff of red roses, stuffed bears etc. It's a story of suffering and sacrifice for the sake of others.not trying to impress by material gain. 

I remember working in an office were it was a sign of your status how many bunches of flowers were delivered to the workplace. Although I went absolutely mental one year when I couldn't get round my teams desk for interflora deliveries and a life size bear that was a giant fire hazard. Not to mention of the sugar high my team was on for the next 24 hours topped up with cheap plonk overnight. I have to admit I burst that balloon literally and metaphorically, by banning any deliveries to my team during work hours. Not because I hated the fun of it, but for the negative effect it had on others who had no deliveries or choose to keep their lives private.

Apart from that it was the sheer expense of money wasted. If you really love someone, why do you have to break the bank on an overpriced meal, crowed with others all doing the same, or roses that suddenly double in price and are totally out of season. Why not surprise them any time with a posy of their favourite flowers after a hard day, or a day out alone with a quiet meal in and uncrowded restaurant on your anniversary? Why wait till a day in your office calender reminds you of the token spending required?

St Valentine was a priest who gave his life to allow other to love. So in his memory would it not be nicer to take the money you would waste on a bunch of flowers that will be dead by Saturday, and instead give it to a charity in your other half's name. Or just perform a random act of kindness to a stranger. They are more fitting to remember the day and a lot less dividing but more uniting.

From my bed here in London happy valentines day,may your life's be filled by knowing you are loved.

Brain overload

Dorothy: "How can you talk if you haven't got a brain?"

Scarecrow: "I don't know... But some people without brains do an awful lot of talking... don't they?"

The wizard of Oz

I guess today I was wondering where to go now. Having one of those moments when the anger has been replaced with nothing but a void of emotion. Even watching the baftas failed to stir my blood.

I had hit that point of emotion exhaustion that left me totally drained and to be honest done with this world. Fed up of governments antagonising each other at the expense of the human race. I wouldn't say I was ready to check out but I was close to being asked to be put on ice.

 Then I started watching 127 hours, hardly a feel good movie, but it worked. It worked at getting my depressed brain back into the realms of uncomfortable resistance. It's horrifying to think that this film is real and as close to watching the event as I ever want to be. It reminds me of schlinders list and the effect that had on me. The only other film I've filed in my life as no need to rematch unless I have completely lost touch with reality. Both films thanks to stunning performances and excellent film making, have the ability to take me down to the rawest of emotions.

Based on that I started thinking what would lift not just me but those who choose to read what I wrote? What could claw back an element of humour and so this page has got a few quotes to help this.

"All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us.”

– Gandalf, from Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring

I did this with the intention of saying sure we all have our down moments. Tiredness can leave even the best of drained. But that's the whole point of the arts. To revive us, to guide us, inspire us and when needed to uplift us. Although neither of my previous mentioned films are what I would call uplifting, they are a sure good kick in the arse. Unless like me you have vertigo then maybe exchange 127 hours for something as my stomach is still wishing film was as realistic as it now is. But then maybe I needed to be scared stupid at that particular moment.

The whole point is history is constructed by struggles of the human race. We are facing a struggle like people before us did and unfortunately probably people after us will. History is full of it on a global, national and personal level. Maybe we have all got a little complacent in the last 50 years. We have forgotten the struggles of the last two world wars and left it as footnotes in history. There a few left who remember real hardship on mass like they knew during the 40s? Maybe we got careless about our right to vote and choose who we let loose with our democracy?

All in all I think this is all ours wake up call and the alarm bells is ringing loudly folks. So yes if it gets you down take a time out, not a check out. Find something that will give you that kick you need and dust yourself off. It's only right we keep resisting until our goal is achieved or our last breath exhaled.

."Most people live life on the path we set for them. Too afraid to explore any other. But once in a while people like you come along and knock down all the obstacles we put in your way. People who realise free will is a gift that you'll never know how to use until you fight for it." The Adjustment Bureau

Resist the clandestine attacks

To suffer woes which Hope thinks infinite;
To forgive wrongs darker than death or night;
To defy Power, which seems omnipotent;
To love, and bear; to hope till Hope creates
From it's own wreck the thing it contemplates;
Neither to change, not falter, nor repent;
This, like thy glory, Titan, is to be
Good, great and joyous,beautiful and free;
This is alone Life, Joy, Empire, and Victory

Percy Bysshe Shelley

There are a lot of quotes and catch phrases going around, but for some reason I was looking for something more substantial. Something that can turn a negative into a positive. So I went fishing in my Byron and Shelley and found this.

It got me thinking, about the eras of the great poets. The metaphysical poets who lived and wrote in a time when we as a country were swinging between  Catholic and protestant on the whim of the monarch of the time. Then you have the likes of Byron and Shelley and the climate of social upheaval they were living through. Through both periods there was also the very obvious outbreaks of talent in composition and playwright. It's like oppression breeds talent.

Now I studied various arts to varying levels and one of the constant questions is what are the authors trying to project in this piece. But looking at it a different way is it not what they are trying to say but rather what do they feel the need to say?

Another key author who uses the times of oppression is John Steinbeck and his dust bowl trilogy. I always struggling when I had to read of mice and men because I couldn't understand the treatment of Lenny to the point it made me mad with anger. But I went back to it and dubious battle recently and released my anger was because for a brief moment we had moved on from that mentally. Unfortunately recently we have taken a massive leap backwards and those issues are now relevant again.

To be honest I am really scared I will have to reread the great gatsby, a book I loathe, if we take any more leaps backwards. But it is frightening how perceptive some of these artists are at the underlying struggle of the masses when things go horribly wrong. And while the world is paddling furiously to stay afloat great artists emerge to document, create, notated and reflect in the most beautiful way imaginable.

Each has a different style and thus capture the times in different focuses, Remember Constable and Turner were contemporaries as much as Mozart and Haydn were. Very very different styles but both reflections of their social existence. Some people opt to follow the Haydon or Constable fashion, calm, pleasant not wave making focus on the positive, others myself included go the Turner Mozart route of blatantly defying and questioning the conventional. But both ways are just as valid and both offer the same thing. Comfort and reassurance there is a way forward.

The arts in turbulent times are often at their peak, for they are at the core of the resistance. When all else is crumbling and the oppression is being sneaky and achieving their objectives by every means fair and foul. The clandestine attacks are meet, documented and exposed by several if not all the arts. Hence you will find a lot of the great artists of the time being the most vocal. The birth of social media is making this even more obvious with their direct call to arms. They are aware of their audience and choose to help educate them. 

The best way to sum other up is remember any great leader can be brought to his knees by the skill of humour from the jester.

Some wise advice

I don't usually do this but I believe it's a message we can all use.




Wise advice From Bernice king..MLK and Coretta's daughter... (and thank you Judy Epstein for sharing)
Some Wise Advice Circulating:
1. Don't use his name
2. Remember this is a regime and he's not acting alone
3. Do not argue with those who support him--it doesn't work
4. Focus on his policies, not his orange-ness and mental state
5. Keep your message positive...they want the country to be angry and fearful because this is the soil from which their
darkest policies will grow
6. No more helpless/hopeless talk
7. Support artists and the arts
8. Be careful not to spread fake news. Check it!
9. Take care of yourselves
10. Resist!
Keep demonstrations peaceful. In the words of John Lennon, "When it gets down to having to use violence, then you are playing the system’s game. The establishment will irritate you - pull your beard, flick your face - to make you fight! Because once they’ve got you violent, then they know how to handle you. The only thing they don’t know how to handle is non-violence and humor."
When you post or talk about him, don't assign his actions to him, assign them to
"The Republican Administration," or "The Republicans."
This will have several effects: the Republican legislators will either have to take responsibility for their association with him or stand up for what some of them don't like; he will not get the focus of attention he craves; Republican representatives will become very concerned about their re-elections"
Despair is not an option! Be active! Be pro-active!
COPY AND PASTE- DON'T SHARE! GET IT TO THE WIDEST AUDIENCE POSSIBLE!

Many snowflakes make a winter storm

I have been hunting for days to find the origin of this use of the word snowflake, and there seems to be no derivative answer, no one person to blame for coining the phrase. Probable a good thing as at the moment the use of such a term is making my blood boil. More than any other slang term I have had thrown at me for some reason. But I can't work out why such an innocent term is causing such a violent emotional outburst.

There have been many times such slang has been thrown about to define a generation who care to fight back. But none as offensive as snowflake ! For it makes us sound like something transparent and delicate that easily melts and goes away. It's the most insulting of slang, that I have heard for years so like the LGBTQA community fought back but embracing certain terms used against them I seek to start the same process.

For a start let's look at the real definition of the word snowflake.

A snowflake is either a single ice crystal or an aggregation of ice crystals which falls through the Earth's atmosphere as snow.^[1] Each flake nucleates around a dust particle insupersaturated air masses by attracting supercooled cloud water droplets, which freezeand accrete in crystal form. Complex shapes emerge as the flake moves through differing temperature and humidity zones in the atmosphere, such that individual snowflakes differ in detail from one another, but may be categorized in eight broad classifications and at least 80 individual variants. The main constituent shapes for ice crystals, from which combinations may occur, are needle, column, plate and rime. Snowflakes appear white in color despite being made of clear ice. This is due to diffuse reflection of the whole spectrum of light by the small crystal facets. ^[2]

Once snowflakes land and accumulate, they undergo metamorphosis with changes in temperature and coalesce into a snowpack. The characteristics of the snowpack reflect the changed nature of the constituent snow crystals.

When it's broken down like this there are a few positives we can us to turn this on the people who are using to spite us. For a start the snowflake is defined as having complex shapes. A good way of describing the human race, each individual and complex. The snow flake is created by moving through different temperature and humidities, another good description of how a human is created, by traveling through life. The description of a snowflake continues by saying there is a broad 8 deferentials with 80 sub definition. Again as generalise as different geographical origins of humans, or even cultures. 

But the bit I love the most is the way the description says a snowflake is constructed to defuse the whole spectrum of light. Now that is the biggest compliment anyone to say they are able to defuse and reflectthe entire spectrum. Now that makes the biggest insult become the biggest compliment.

Now take one little snow flake all on its own, and it doesn't achieve much other than to look pretty. However many many many flakes all united in the same place at the same time and the effects can vary from mild inconvenience to total chaos with results varying in levels of destruction. As one human shouting on their own does little but a lot gathered together can destroy. A snowstorm can blind anyone, freeze everything  and destroy anything it is way, as long as the climate allows.

Now think about calling so many upset and offended humans snowflakes, in a climate of political and social unrest? You are creating your own snowstorm, with possible repercussions of equal devastion to the system.

Ok I'm still not happy about being called a delicate little snowflake, but at least I know know i a one little flake in a winters torment, and this storming is brewing for the perfect moment to hit and cause complete chaos. Welcome to our winter.

Practice empathy promote equality

I saw those words at the end of a video about what not say to wheel chair uses. But it's a message we could all use in our daily lives.

Empathy is a tricky quality to add to your lives. It's that fine line between sympathy and not becoming condescending. They actually run courses on it if you work in sales. So you can see its often used as tool rather than a human quality. But true Empathy comes from the heart, it's the ability to be able to see and address a person as a human equal without any focus or distraction to any difference. It means you are talking soul to soul without noticing the shell. It's a case of look but don't see, the physical that is. The sentence "oh but I don't see....." May sound the best empathic sentence when in fact it is the most patronising and over privileged sentence known to man. This way a point highlighted to me, the mean fact a person feels the need to use such a sentence takes any empathy and turns into at best sympathy and worse undermining patronising falseness.

Empathy isn't something you can say or even sell, it is something you project. Despite the endless courses I have attended to teach me how to use it to close a sale, it's utter rubbish as it's something that can't be used in any pitch. It's constructed from repeating daily actions. From your eye contact in the street saying good morning, to inviting friends to a match. It's only when we are truly empathic that we are truly promoting equality. But it's hard for us to practise as we on an average are privileged and by that alone it creates a mental barrier. Only when we realise what our privilege is can we learn to overcome such a mental divide and become a whole human without prejudice.

Bemused, Befuddled Bewildered

Social studies say we live in a post modernity society, even the label is daunting. It took an practical exercise to explain it to me. A few years back I was at an away course for religious enlightenment and the concept was fully explained to me. The hall set up for the usual lecture and debate, but instead there was total silence, which itself can be very eerie when there are so many. We are told that when we are overwhelmed or over stimulated we were to either move to the side or bow our heads. Then slowly one by one various sensory stimuli were introduced, first being classical music, then a slide show on top, then a fragrance and so on layered on top of each other when we started to get things like two different music tracks and a film as well as slide show so around the 6  or even 5 mark most people bailed. By 10 there was me and two others and by 12 or 13 I was on my own and the exercised stopped. Not believing I had got that far I was asked to list in order and detail what I had been exposed to. Unfortunately for the leader I could and did in detail, right down to the movement of Mozart 40th, the possible origin of the perfume and the lines in the film. This kind of put a spanner in his lecture, or rather I was the exception that proved the rule.

The whole point of it was to prove how hard it is for the human brain to deal with the bombardment of media in this post modern world. And how hard it is to deal with too much information at any given moment. Perhaps I should have warned him I have a high I and photographic memory. But then there are a few who can cope, most think they can but only a few truly can. Try it at home start with the TV on , add music, then start reading or writing whilst someone sprays a perfume, now add a second music. It all becomes a blur of information to the majority, and that's not a bad thing humans are programmed to prioritise. It's basic human instinct to judge the most important threat and act on it.

For me being able to work under multiple stimuli, actually was a problem. I can't concentrate on just one thing and it got me in real grief and school, and lead to multiple exam retakes as my mind panics if it has to focus on one solo activity and suddenly everything I know goes out the window. But it does mean there is room for evolution, even if it is a bit scary. So while you may be a little jealous don't be, it's a curse as much as blessing as it doesn't fit the current norm, and that then becomes a source of ridicule.

However it does help at the moment when so much is happening most people are left spinning or at least emotionally exhumed with the current state of world affairs. It means a few people like myself, and some a lot more qualified are able to focus on this consent white noise that is being thrown at us all and not quite see what is being hidden but be prepared for it. For we can focus on the patterns of the past  amid the chaos that is no doubt being deliberately caused by press offices and media alike. For much as I have since looked into post modernity after I was told about it, you can beat every spin doctor, press agent and so has studied it in immense detail, learning how to work this system of over stimulation by media to make it work for what ever cause or action they are trying to achieve.

It's a well know fact that if you continually repeat a lie, eventually some people start believing it's truth. Now take that principle and times by 10, reiterating on TV, in the press, on line, in the radio. Eventually people on mass start taking it as fact, and once you get a core of believers it is easy to expand. That's how the crazy becomes the normal. If you allow your gut instinct to be drowned out by the noise of the mass, you then lose grip on reality and commonsense. That's the principle of post modernity, to drown out everything with what they want to hear, see and do.

Now in the future the numbers of people who can naturally isolate every action will increase,and at the rate we are going it's going to be sooner rather than later, but for those who are still left confused and lost in this flood of voices, all I can suggest is you stop and listen to your own heart and head first and let the lead you into your next course of action. Humans are like lemmings naturally, we are just being treated as such by those who think they are cleverer.

The truth is knowledge is power, but the skill is to work out where you obtain said knowledge. If something niggles at you to double check you facts then that's the right course of action for you. I know I have written some hardcore comments recently, but only after I have checked and doubled checked what are the hard facts of the matter. Sometimes I have to delay what I want to write, as what has been said may not be the most honest account of what is happening. I never read just one paper, but many, sometimes all of the ones I can get hold of. This is the world we live in, every has their spin and often the most powerful make the most noise, when it may not be the most truthful. Leaving us all bemused, befuddled and bewildered when it all goes horribly wrong.

Common sense from strange places

If you have read my previous posts you will know I have little love for our governments either side of the Atlantic, however I do believe in praise where it's due. Today I have to applaud The speaker of the house of commons.

In the British set up the speaker is meant to be politically neutral, although in this day and age that is harder to believe. However today a man I have little time for as I personally think he is a bit of a wet blanket, stood up and spoke the words a majority of the British public have been shouting. That in present light, due to present behaviour Donald Trump has no right to address our parliament and to allow him to do so would disregard all our values against racism, gender quality and the like.

Now this is a brave move as the MPs are set to discuss the reduction of the invitation of a state visit to be downgraded later in the month, if as I suspect they vote to down grade the presidential invitation, alongside the now decision not to allow him to speak to the two leading houses., its an indirect way to cancel the invitation as a whole. Without say the honest truth that most of us don't want to waste our hard earned taxes on such a bigot.

In a way it's the British stiff upper lip that has dug us out the political  mine field our wonderful leader dumped us in. So instead of saying sorry your invitation has been retracted because our voting public have said so they can now say, sorry but your recent actions have lead us to withdraw the offer as it undermines all we stand for. Not bad from a idiot who struggles to keep the most daily language in debates to a pg rating.

Like I said I have no time for most of our governing force at the present, but for showing some balls and acting in commonsense, well done Mr Bercow, nice way to calm the waters, for the moment at least.

The fine line between democracy and dictatorship

It's a fine line living in a democratic society, the line between listening and representing the masses and turning into a fascist society. I think you know where I am going with this but I am not going say it is one country alone but the whole of the western world is heading to take a giant leap into the darkened past. Russia I believe is leading the way closely followed by the a large chunk of the rest of us.

What made me think this was in the new today where it has documented that several states of the USA are applying to remove the right to protest. A fundemental right of every civilian in the west. If things aren't running how people believe they should, they have always had the right to protest, and speak out against them. To remove this rights is to remove our basic liberty and freedom and to become a non free society. So the out come of these court actions is crucial to us all, because if one court in one country rules in favour of this application it opens the flood gates for all courts in all countries to rule this way. Once we lose the right to protest, we lose other rights, like the right to petition, to question, to have a voice. Thus quietly allowing a democracy to become a dictatorship.

So this news that has convientantly shoved into the general whole noise of all the other horrors that are going on, becomes overlooked. In fact that is a very concious ploy to allow these laws to be past. Amid the fury of a fictional massacre, the ongoing travel ban of Muslims and so on, this is side note that is quietly slipping through and thus becoming the most missed opportunity.The British government is just as guilty, slipping laws through under the noise of Brexit, keeping the voting public distracted and blind to their deviousness.

I guess what I am trying to say is that to avoid being misled by our leaders, we need to pay attention to more than the big noise events. Protest, demos rate by all means but for all that is sacred, pay attention to the sie columns of news, the debates in government and get on your representatives case if you see something that you don't like. Remember a lot of pevious dictators were voted in by the masses in the belief they were the new hope, only to find they were less luke skywalker and more darth vader. Even Hitler was popular in the beginning, and Stalin was part of the allied resistance..

Il give you a few quick statistics, 20 days in power, 10 executive decisions, staff replaced if they dare to defy or question, falsified events, failure to disclose tax returns, or business interests. This is the list so far for someone leading a democracy, when in reality it's a worse start than any of the dictators of the 20th century. Now ask yourself are we really still in a democracy?

Beginning to fume here

Ok, would some one kindly tell me what is going on. Like where has all the tolerance gone from the world. I have just been left absolutely steaming by the leader of our opposite party claiming people "choose to be gay". Like hell they do, they choose their sexuality as much as they do their eye colour, I.e it's defined by the dna and hormones. With such public people speaking in such a way we will never gain true equality.

How stupid are these people, it's not as if some one wakes up and says oh I fancy making my life ten times more difficult today by switching my sexual orientation. We are in a world where there is a real struggle to get certain demographics the correct support they need, like the trans gendered, or even pan sexual.  I guess I cheated my way through life by acting heterosexual for the first thirty years, when in reality I am obviously bi. But I grew up in a less accepting time with the start of the aids crisis. That said every move to progress our freedom I have supported, to the point I have become very outspoken about it. Especially as statistically it has been proved more people are disposed to being bi rather than hero, and there is a definite hormonal difference in the make up of people who are gay, trans, even A sexual. So we have the science to back up the emotions.

Personal I would love to take it a step further and remove all labels from society and allow people to just be with their sexual peference. Providing both parties are of the age of consent, what the hell does it matter? I don't define my friends by who they sleep with, but what they hold in their heart and soul.  The whole put a label on people, is a crazy situation, created by controlling bodies to divide people and install fear.

A person does not choose their Sexuality and that's a fact, but they do choose to be a closet minded idiot and there seems to be an awful lot of that going on with people who have too loud a voice on the public soap box. I have lost all respect I may have had for that one leader in the thirty seconds it took for him to utter those words. When all he had to do was use those thirty seconds to say something constructive, rather than something so destructive. Tolerance people please, and if you can't say something positive, just shut up.

And on day 14

I wasn't going to write today, thinking the day wasn't going that bad, until my news feed started beeping at me. How I wished I hadn't looked. To be truthful I was trying to stick my head in the sand with today's white paper over the infamous Brexit. But no the bad keeps coming. Apparently not happy with directly upsetting Iran, Australia and Mexico, not to mention all the barred countries, wasn't enough upset for the week. No in America they have just overruled the law to prohibit the mentally unstable from carrying and buying guns.

Now anyone who knows me knows I hate guns with a vengeance. Apart from the odd air rifle at the fair I won't go near them. I am lucky the UK doesn't have the right to bare arms unless you are a farmer or similar, and that's the way it should be. Guns are a weapon of deadly intent and I see little need for them in our society, as you are hardly going to run into a polar bear in the middle of the street, or meet a rogue lion in your living room. It's one of the main reasons I'm often ill at ease in America, the knowledge that some people are always carrying a weapon. Unless you live in the mountains or Alaska there is no need for anyone other than  farmers, rangers and police to be carrying.

I'm sorry but are you wanting to get shot, letting everyone and anyone carry a life ending weapon? This is not the 1890s and you are not in the wild west anymore! Why am I bothered you ask? Well a few reasons  the first is i have my husbands family and some friends who live out there and their safety is always my concern. Secondly I actually like parts of America and would like to see more even study out there. But the main reason is these weapons become easily obtainable they have a tendency to pop up anywhere, even in other countries.

In all seriousness is this the right path to be following, opening up less stable people's access to guns, when society as a majority would like to see regulations tightened on them. And before anyone says you have never shot a gun you don't know what it feels like. Yes I have , my great uncle had a remote farm in England a bit to near a prison for safety. We were all taught how to fire both a rifle and shotgun, and in my case a pistol. We were all taught the severity of it all and the dangers, like the wrong ammunition in the wrong gun. Most of all we were taught it was the last resort action to fire on another. Even then I practised enough to be able to wound without taking life just causing massive pain. That said I can do the same with a knife and a bow and arrow. But I choose not to have these weapons on me, in my house or anywhere else. I leave it to the people who need to do it. People who are trained to deal with psychology of it all.

Basically what has happened now has challenged the safety of every man woman and child, plus any animals on that continent. Because it only takes one unstable person in a bad mood, with a couple of semi automatic weapons and another school or mall could become a place of the next massacre. Not to mention it puts any dignitaries in further danger, just look at past history, 4 sitting presidents shot dead, 2 further injured, and that's just presidents. Celebrities, senators even popes have either died or been injured by guns. Guns have no place in domestic life of the 21st century and certainly no place in the hands of those less stable than the norm.

I breath a sigh of relief that the UK doesn't seem to want to follow this path, for a change. But this law will have a ripple effect and one I really don't want to read or hear in tomorrow's news. We are meant to have evolved  beyond caveman mentality, but I am now convinced of this less and less.

Did we create this monster

To start let me say the is a big difference between celebrity and say star or artist. Keep this in mind when you read as a star or artist is someone who has studied and refined a talent or skill over many years of hard work and often blood sweat and tears. A celebrity is some one who seeks attention for attentions sake and to make an easy dollar or pound.

With that in mind I have been thinking. Is a lot of the social mess we are all in based purely from our almost social addiction of celebrity. Somewhere in the last twenty years we have moved our appetite from star gossip to celebrity overload. Gone is our desire to aspire to the lofty airs of a Hollywood star, and replaced with the instant gratification of the reality. I personally hate reality TV.  I find it demeaning and often too graphically explicit to be called entertainment.  I have no desire to watch some ones sex tape or want to torture my body into a caricature of ridiculous proportions. Give me old school glamour and the air of mystery any day.

But how much of this demand of instant wanton greed is what has fuelled our social decisions. Sure artists and politics have over lapped over the last decade, both successfully and sometimes less so. In many cases it's because a person has studied society and how to manipulate speech to varying levels of service to the public. But also they also know how to inspire and lift spirits and that's why they are not so much a danger as a logical progression.

However a celebrity who is more famed for getting caught in sexuality explicit antics, or drunken brawls is nothing to aspire to. Instead it should in common decency be condoned and shunned. However it has become the stable filler of tabloids and glossy magazines alike. What's worse is it has become a job many desire as it is shown as an easy way to accumulate wealth and cultural status. Life has become more instagram and less intelligence.

Sure if it's your desire to pickle your liver and let people see enough of your anatomy that they could become your gynaecologist, so be it, but don't consider it to be a talent worthy of mass wealthy and status. Yet that is how our youth and not so young are viewing it.

Now if that is how you set your moral compass by what  standards are you judging others. More importantly how are you choosing who has the conscious to represent yourself in major decisions. Or are you even bothering. The media itself is as much to blame by guiding us down a false path, by putting high ranking officials in the same glossy magazine as some one whose main claim to fame is whose is her babies daddy. It's crazy, it's like the who moral guidelines got shredded and replaced by whose who of fashion and social notoriety.

So I am left asking the question, if will fill our minds with utter rubbish on a daily basis do we leave ourselves enough intelligence to question things that really matter before its too late?