Over did it today so currently back under my duvet bored. Having killed 30 mins painting my nails various different colours as an experiment I am now doing the endless competitions knowing will never win.
Last months coffee win was a total fluke. When you consider I won that yet have entered at least a hundred before that. I never win the big stuff like the years supply of tea or the gadgets from the TV competitions. But they do pass the time and some even cause my rotting brain cells to work.
How ever it won't take away from the crushing realisation that tomorrow I could have gone to London with a friend or the local fireworks, but can't go to either due to money and the lack of a chaperon as at either event I could still get damaged. So I lose out every way, and that has crushed me. I have only missed the fireworks twice in my 40 years, once due to mumps and the other because I was away, and the reason it is going to torture me more is it is 5 mins away behind my local church. So I am going to be stuck hearing every bang, and the cheers of the people. but probably not see it because of the direction of it all.
Basically my whole weekend is a blow out due to lack of funds and people to hold me upright. I can't believe my life thanks to illness has been reduced to this. I could be having a total blast watching the cars in Regents Street, followed by display I love to watch annually of firework, and instead I am going to spend it stuck at home with the joke called British television.
Wake me up on Monday I don't want to know the rest of the weekend.
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Please feel free to leave a comment or add to this. Its only my thoughts on life. I just raise the questions in my mind.