Labeled or finally acknowledged

I promised I wouldn't post anything medical until I had some new to the mix. Well this morning I got the letter from the DLA, the decision on whether or not they accept the reports and write ups on my medical conditions. Prior to earlier this year I live a very independant life, but by August walking unaided became imposiable. Now if I try to move round the house without aids I end up doubled up. But because all my conditions are invisable from the outside, I was prepared for an endless battle to prove and admit to myself I need help.

Never have I been so nervous as opening the envelope when it arrived. At first I couldn't face reading more than the first two sentences, in fear of it saying I was rejected in my claim. Especially as I have managed to escape the dreaded DHSS medical. How ever the letter didn't have those fateful lines, instead it said I was recognised as needing mobility needs and some care needs. The relief was unbelievable, and I have to admit it took all day to truly sink in, that people believed me, and the doctors and consultants are on the same page as yourself.

To me it isn't about the money, although that will buy me some freedom, instead it actually will open doors for me. It means that should I make enough progress to return to work, which is my goal next year, I have a piece of paper telling employers that the conditions I have are real, and do genuinely affect me. This means that I not unemployable, but need acceptance to be employed.

I am not looking at this as a label or a dead end, but instead a freedom pass to return to the normal world. Sure there will be a fight at times, and some people are going to try and pigeon box me, but at the end of the day I am still the same person I was ten years ago, I just can't walk as easily or carry stuff. Being recognised as disabled ( how I hate that word) is no curse, it just means I do things differently. I still have a brain, a mouth and hands, a university education, and years of experience, so what changes. In my eyes nothing but the speed I get from a to b.

There is a lot to be said about that, but instead I will sum it up with an age old fable, I have gone from being the hare to the tortoise, and we all know who got there first!