The day after the disaster

I have been quiet on line, but not in real life. The last three days have been a mixture of such high pain the air went blue on plain unconsciousness. Hardly the way I planned to turn 40.

After yet another doctor discussion the verdict is the mixture of having to jabs and my back pain has been so volatile it has sent my CRPS into such a frenzy I have had a complete system overload. How nice, and no one thought of this before why? It is well known that I react badly to most jabs but to do one in both arms for different illnesses was that straw to many apparently and the doctor agreed I should have had them weeks apart. Now there is little anyone can do but double up one medicine and hope it blocks enough of the pain signals until my immune system calms down.

In the mean time I have actually taken some massive steps backwards. Instead of being near vertical whilst standing without my crutches I am back to being bent at a near 45 degree angle,  like I was at the beginning of August, and I am sleeping till mid day and passing out by 5 for a couple of hours. I am so out of touch I actually woke up at 7pm not knowing what day I was in let alone what time. It is hard to describe the disorientation that creates, but I know there is an element of fear in there.

My bigger fear is that one of my birthday presents involves a drive to Birmingham on the 27th and back on the 28th. That gives me about two weeks to sort my medication and pain levels so I am back to the state I was a week ago. Quiet a frightening thought. The only advise I was given by the doctor was, to give myself a few days to let the jabs work through my system and take it from there. So in the mean time my neighbours have to put up with the screams in multiple languages, none of the pleasant.

I did receive a late birthday card today so it seems my birthday is going to come in dribbles rather than one special day, but when even your own parent says you really need to postpone it till January once you are stable and in established treatment, it is a little gutting. Especially when 10 years ago I was capable of having a week long party and often did.

This is the hidden effect of CRPS and how it can turn a situation from inconvenient to completely debilitating. It just a major downer it had to happen on my birthday. My birthday became a non milestone as it was dragged down by the millstone I live with.